When you throw something into a gift bag, what you’re really saying is “I have more important friends and you’re not worth the effort.” Do you want me to show up to your next dinner party in sweatpants carrying a tray of lil smokies, because I WILL if you ever present me with this monstrosity.

And R.S.V.P. doesn’t mean “Randomly show up with vodka, people.” It means “GET YOUR ASS ON THE PHONE AND LET ME KNOW IF YOU’RE COMING TO MY PARTY.” Etiquette, loves.

Back to gift giving. When you offer someone a token of your affection, whether it’s a homemade cheese ball or a silver platter, it will be viewed as an extension of yourself. Put some effort into it, the same way you throw on those Spanx and wax whatever needs waxing. Here’s a set of vintage songbird napkin rings that I thoughtfully wrapped for my dear friend, Olivia. I kept it simple and natural with craft paper, black satin ribbon and a sprig of cedar. She knows I love her.